Q. For whom is this book intended?

A. This book is designed as a comprehensive guide to the 2012 Presidential Election for potential voters and non-voters alike.

Q. What do you mean by potential non-voters?


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Q. For whom is this book intended?

A. This book is designed as a comprehensive guide to the 2012 Presidential Election for potential voters and non-voters alike.

Q. What do you mean by potential non-voters?

A. People who haven’t read the book.

Q. Any particular sort of potential voter?

A. Potential voters of all types: the decided, the undecided, the almost, kind of, really close to, near-the-vicinity-of decided and the you-couldn’t-budge-me-with-anything-less-than-a-$300,000-direct-deposit-into-my-Swiss Bank Account decided.

Q. What questions does this book answer?

A. Easy questions. Hard questions. Any question that could possibly be answered by a series of smartass, cynical, semi-schmaltzy, highly acerbic, humorist-type ramblings. Even stupid questions. Remember there are no stupid question only Low Information Voters.

Q. What does that mean?

A. Low Information Voter is a new demographic category that means “stupid people.” But the great thing is—you get to say it right in front of them. ROTFLMFAOLARTB.

Q. Got an example?

A. A recent poll shows 52% of Mississippi Republicans still believe President Obama is Muslim. And that doesn’t include the hefty percentage who believe he’s muslin.

Q. Isn’t that a loosely woven cotton fabric?

A. Correctamundo. And yes, it does tend to confuse them, but it’s a state to which they’ve become accustomed.

Q. You mean Mississippi.

A. Exactly. Now you’ve got it.

Q. Got what?

A. I don’t know, but it’s all over the front of your shirt. Go directly to the bathroom and wash it off. Immediately after purchasing the book, that is.

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